Let your life lightly dance on the edges of time like a dew on the tip of a leaf - Rabindranath Tagore
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We all form self images and much of our behavior is pretty well determined by how we feel about ourselves. ~ Eunice Bauman-Nelson, PhD ~
A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song. ~MAYA ANGELO~
We want to turn negative habits into positive ones as a prelude to the larger freedom of moment to moment perception and wisdom. Being in the here and now. But the question always arises how to do this. We ask how if a negative experience has been created in our unconscious memory and the spontaneous recall continues to trouble the present how we can stop it from resurfacing. We often believe that we are imprisoned by an unchangeable past. We are not. Rumination reinforces the problem as in Western psychology one recites and reflects repeatedly one's problems. We have to let old wounds heal , it does not mean repressing them but it means that what is not fed will wither.
I began this blog with the idea that though some women may have been abused they may have still been successful at meeting their goals and dreams but not successful at a long term committed relationship. If you find yourself in a situation where your "value" and accomplishments are still for his ambition, his goals, his fame or what have you; may feel used and even in a power struggle that is verbal and emotional abuse. This is the time to become aware of the difference between your inner self and external self. To become ultimately free you must be honest as to what the "catch" is that keeps you attracting a relationship that is not of true partnership, caring, sharing and loving. Once you find your true inner self you will set yourself free of limitations. You will have a solid foundation. It is a process and requires honesty on your part of how and from where you have been functioning. Because everything is energy you must let go of the current relationship to free space for what you really want.
The ability to "simplify" means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak. - Hans Hoffman. The last week or so I have been cleaning out closets, cupboards, drawers throwing out what is not being used, is broken or damaged. I have done this through the entire house - getting rid of old things. We call this feng shui which is about harmony and balance. We eliminate in order to bring in the new. We can also use this with our thoughts, mind and relationships.
We live on the material plane - we live on earth. No matter what your belief is - we are in a body, which is material and we have a personality. But beneath the body and personality there is another level of dimension that is eternal and timeless. It is of pure spirit. This is who you really are. When you can find that place in you - nothing that ever happened, is happening or what anyone has done to you matters at that point where it affects your life or your feelings about yourself. This is the place of strength which helps you reclaim your life, your soul and your dreams.
The outside world - the outside dream- based on thought consciousness of others has infiltrated your dream of who you really are. Silence those voices. If something replays over and over in the mind it causes hurt. Forgive and let go of the hurt to stop the replaying so you can begin to create your life once more.
Looking in the mirror you will see clearly that the opinions of others who were significant in your life had real problems that they put on you. So you may have grown up with lack in many areas of your life. Remember that it was their feelings - not yours - they projected onto you - you believed it because you did not know any better - that is also energy you have carried all your life. Looking in the mirror you may see pain, mistakes and heartache but you will also see strength, learned lessons and pride in yourself. Stay in the now and not in the past.
Often times we confuse having healthy boundaries and in doing so we put up walls. Walls keep everything and everyone out and locks you within. That ends up being a very lonely place where you are locked inside, unable to connect with others because the wall is made of brick. Boundaries are like drawbridges - they are changeable; you get to decide who gets to cross over. You decide when the bridge is open and when it is closed. It is a boundary that allows you to invite others in or say no with Love.
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